The Norman Transcript

May 9, 2014

Discoveries that must be shared

The Norman Transcript

NORMAN — Book signings are fun because of the people we meet and the unexpected things we encounter along the way. The recent jam-packed weekend of three book signings in Norman was no exception.

Going north on I-35, take Exit 42 and prepare to be surprised. Go west on Highway 53 to Pioneer Road, turn north (right) and go the bottom of the hill where gravel has washed up on the blacktop. Stop, put your vehicle in neutral, take your foot off the brake, sit back and wait for the magic of Magnetic Mountain to begin.

Suddenly, your car will be pulled backwards up the hill at approximately 10 miles an hour. Hubby calls it “an optical conclusion” (he has such a way with words). No matter what he says, it is fun to believe that your vehicle is moved by the magical and magnetic power of the mountain. Even the surliest teenager will sit up and take notice. Twisting around to get a better view, that frown will morph into a surprised smile.

Back on the Interstate once again, one cannot help but take in the scenery around the oldest known formations in the United States between the Appalachian and Rocky Mountains, the Arbuckle Mountains. When the scenery devolves into a series of exits to the casinos and towns along the way, your attention may drift to the license tags on passing cars.

It is amazing how many cars have Oklahoma tags. Semi-cute, I know. However, what you may not know is that Oklahoma is misspelled on the state license tags. To verify this, and for the sake of safety, the Okie car you are about to inspect must not be in motion. Actually, you should be standing still as well to inspect the tag.

The third letter which should be an “L” is actually an “I” camouflaged by the extended left leg of the “A” that follows.

A brief stop at the Canadian River Winery in Lexington to stock up on my favorite wine, Chocolate Merlot. Thanks to a wacky Oklahoma law, the export of a wine named after the varietal (the single grape variety) along with an additive is prohibited. As long as the wine is sold within the state there is no problem. Another example of how the twisted minds of politicians can make life more difficult. Since the wine is sold outside of the state, it is now called Chocolate Drop — same yummy flavor and aroma, but a new label and moniker.

It is surprising what you learn about people during a relatively brief chat during a book signing.

For instance, a delightful lady shared that she had donated a kidney to her brother. She explained that throughout his entire life he had health issues. Consequently, from his birth on she had a recurring dream that they were children chased by bad guys.

Then at some point the dreams stopped, that is until his kidneys failed. Then the same dreams returned and continued until after his successful kidney transplant. After that they were gone for good.

Her only complaint to the surgeon at the post operation checkup was more of a request. “Next time cut in the crease and not across the roll,” she said and lifted her shirt to show everyone the diagonal scar across her muffin top.

At one of the book signings, a group stopped by and someone complained about being tired because “I just came from Red Rock.” After everyone’s eyebrows soared into their hairlines, the speaker hastened to clarify. “I was at the Red Rock Canyon Grill in Tulsa.” The reason for the surprised glances was that Red Rock, Oklahoma is a Drug and Alcohol Treatment and Rehab Center.

The confusion on the part of the listeners was understandable and proved that there can be such a thing as too much brevity.

Not everyone is blessed with Earnest Hemingway’s economy and precision with words.

Elizabeth is a freelance writer and author. Her latest novel Sins of the Father available on Website:

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