The Norman Transcript

Opinion

July 20, 2013

Read along to the beat

(Continued)

NORMAN —

According to the story, Beyonce was performing in concert when she noticed someone in the front row recording her show with a cellphone. The story said that Beyonce was leading the crowd in a “sing along” when she noticed the fan with the cellphone and said the following: “See you can’t sing because you’re too busy taping. I’m right in your face baby. You gotta seize the moment baby. Put that damn camera down!”

The story doesn’t say what the fan did, if anything, but I have an idea what I would have done. I’m pretty sure I would have said, “Look BEE-ON-say! That’s right. I mispronounced your name. Do you know how much a front row seat to one of your concerts costs? For that kind of money, if I want to watch a baseball game, clip my toe nails, reset my iTunes password AND record you on my cellphone, that’s what I’m going to do. Now be quiet and get back to singing.”

I don’t mean that in a bad way. For all I know, Beyonce may have been trying to be nice to the fan. For all I know, she was trying to get the fan to live in the moment and not get hung up on the future.

I also might have mentioned to Beyonce that I paid money to hear HER sing. I didn’t pay money to have to sing along with her. I hate when performers lead crowds in sing alongs.

“LA LA LA LA ... come everybody, sing along with me!”

No. You’re the singer. I’m the listener. You sing. I’ll listen.

The other day I took my car to get new tires. At no time did one of the mechanics ever come out to the waiting room and say, “Come on Mike, loosen the lug nuts on these tires with me!”

It would be like me stopping in mid-column and saying, “Come on everyone, type along with me. Well, except you George Will.”

Nothing against George, but I’m thinking he would type a lot of big words that nobody else has heard before.

Besides, I hear he is notoriously controlling.

Mike Pound is a columnist for CNHI News Service. Contact him at The Joplin (Mo.) Gloe at mpound@joplinglobe.com.

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