NORMAN — We’ve reached day 134 of the NBA lockout and still no signs of an agreement coming anytime soon. The owners ended their meeting late Thursday with what Commissioner David Stern characterized as their best offer to the players union.
NBPA executive director Billy Hunter had other words to describe it.
“It’s not the greatest proposal in the world,” Hunter said. “But I have an obligation to at least present it to our membership. So that’s what we’re going to do.”
The union is planning to meet with the player representatives Monday and decide whether to accept the latest deal or not. From the talk of Hunter and union President Derek Fisher, it doesn’t sound like they have already decided to decline the deal and continue to negotiate. Regardless, it looks like NBA fans are going to be in for a long wait before they see any real pro basketball again.
With that in mind, I am going to help NBA fans who will be searching for things to occupy their time. Here is a list of activities fans can get involved with until the NBA players and owners come to their senses and realize they are killing the game that has made most of them rich beyond their dreams.
5. Join a cult. Because you will toil in the fields and have to give up all of your worldly possessions, you will not have time to worry about not seeing Kevin Durant take on LeBron James on Christmas. By the time the New Year comes around, you will have been so brainwashed, you will have forgotten what basketball is anyways.
4. Get into soccer. It’s the one sport that never seems to have labor issues. The players and owners apparently know how to make money and share it equally. Also, no matter the time of the year or part of the world, you can always find a soccer game on TV. And if you’re lucky, you might see a riot or two.
3. Read a book. I know it’s something that is no longer done and most kids today may be hard pressed to point out a book that isn’t a graphic novel, but books take time to read. And they are also heavy, so if you are ever mugged, they can be used as a defensive weapon. I recommend Charles Barkley’s book, “Who’s Afraid of a Large Black Man?”
2. Movie marathons. I’m not talking your standard Lord of the Rings, James Bond, The Notebook films. Those are too easy. Go for sports flicks that center around basketball. I recommend “The Fish That Saved Pittsburgh,” “Fastbreak,” “He Got Game,” and “The Basketball Diaries.” I would include “Airplane” just because Kareem Abdul Jabbar is hilarious.
1. Learn to dance. Women love to dance. That’s the only reason needed.
Hopefully, these suggestions will not be needed and the season starts next month. But if it doesn’t, this is not only for fans, but for NBA players and owners. Because if the season is cancelled, those two groups will have a lot of time to think about just how bad they messed up the game.
Michael Kinney 366-3537 email@example.com